liberty

today is the celebration of our nation freedom from colonial rule. so as usual, we recite back how the previous generations fought for the independence. but some say history is written by the group in power. history can be altered! but why only learn how they fight. for me, equally important if not more important, is the fact of how the previous generations mistakenly let the colonial get into our nation. and how some of the local people scandalously worked with the colonial.

think about it.

diary of a father IX - celebration

we're celebrating! my kids' faces are full of smile. even for the two-year old! why can't we, as adult, do the same thing?

Japan, the PM resigned

so the Japanese has a new prime. 5 in 5 years. what a record. from my perspective, that shows the high accountability of those politicians. for example the out-going Kan accepted that he had some problem in handling the huge post-tsunami event. but he still lead the country during the crisis and quit when the time is right. kudos Japanese.

diary of a father VIII - papa, I'm here!

I had a habit of reading a Saturday's newspaper early in the morning. sometimes when I'm reading, nothing can get my eyes off the newspaper. one day, I read the newspaper as usual. I put the newspaper on the floor. my son at that time still couldn't crawl. I heard some noise from the kid but I ignored it. but I knew he's looking at me. suddenly he started rolling and finally landed on the newspaper. he apparently succeeded in stopping me from keep on reading. it's time to play with him.

diary of a father VII - it's time to go!

every morning, before we went out to work, I would start my car and heating up the engine for only a few minutes. my son would usually already woke up and lied on bed. then we took the kid, bring in to the car and off we went. that process repeated every day.

one weekend, I did the same thing. but I heated up the car's engine a lot longer. then I heard my kid made a noise. then I realised that we didn't take him although the engine had started quite some time. sense of time! he understood the sense of time and event around it. what a miracle!

diary of a father VI - a story of integrity

yesterday I was driving alone when I started thinking about integrity. I was a staunch supporter of such attitude and I seek for the reason. suddenly I remember about a colouring contest I participated during my primary school. my father told me about this story:

there were two pieces of works finally made it to the top. which one of those was mine. each drawing bear the participant name. the judges wrote on a piece of paper and put it underneath each drawing. the paper wrote '1' or '2'. it simply meant whether the drawing was eligible for either first place of second place. when they counted the paper, the result was a tie. so my father, as a chief judge, need to make a final decision. he had not to chose mine. so I got no. 2 spot.

at that time what I felt was a proud feeling. yes, I'm at number 2. but it also meant that I'm not a number 1 just because I had an advantage. perhaps that's a reason for me to believe in integrity.

Libya - liberty II

it has been few days after Tripoli was taken by the rebels. the situation reminds me what had happened in Ivory Coast few months ago. the war erupted in the capital and some people said both sides commit crime. the people who were depressed and fight and win, eventually depress the other group of people.I don't know exactly what had happened after apartheid fell in South Africa. but I did watch a documentary about a Committee (Truth and Reconciliation Committee) which heard all grouses. and I really don't know whether the model is good. but  with all the experience that we had, from Nuremberg Trial to the Committee, can we learn something?

diary of a father V - a story of ants

Once my son, my wife and myself were preparing to sleep. back then we own very less things, not even a bed. so we slept on the floor, of course with sort of mattress put on. my son crawl everywhere until at one spot when he suddenly stopped and looking at something. when I took a look, he was watching a marching ants. he looked at the insects quite a long time. the next day, when we arrived home, he rushed to the spot where he saw the ants last night. but now there were no more ants, but emptiness. he looked at me, puzzled.

I'm sure that my son will never remember this story. but I did. and I want to share this story with him. saying that how proud we are. how proud we are that he had developed a skill and acquire knowledge with his own effort. of course he needs guidance. everyone does. but guidance alone will bring you to nowhere. it is you, yourself that must take an effort to follow the guidance.

Libya - liberty

I read news about rebels in Libya is closing in Tripoli. is it a beginning of the end of a war. a war which represents the price of pursuit for liberty. I just hope that there will be minimum casualty if not zero. I hope...

diary of a father IV - the birth of a bigger family

I spent exactly five days awaiting for my first child - a son. still clear in my memory I sent my wife to hospital o Monday morning after she experienced sort of bleeding. the hospital was about 30 km away from my home. so, I spent the following nights at relative home nearer to the hospital. and I spent each day in hospital compound.

on Thursday my wife experienced contraction that made her pretty pain. I've never seen such a pain on a face, I cried - really I don't know what to do. but it was yet the time. finally on Friday afternoon, my son was born into this world. no words can described that moment.

today, he's almost as high as his father. I named him after a previous ruler of my home state. my hope for him is one - that he can serve his society, country and religion well, regardless what he is.

a loss of a friend

I went to pay a last respect for a friend who died in a very high dignity. from what I learnt, he was killed by  a vehicle during his effort to save his child. the child saved.

I still remember about four or five years ago, when I sought his help to return a gift by an acquaintance. the gift was sent to my home address, which I considered as highly inappropriate. in fact, the act of giving a gift was, from my opinion, inappropriate. I was then brought the gift to the office and ordered the person to take back the gift. nothing happened. so I asked my friend to show me the address since he knew the place better. after I put back the gift at the front gate of the acquaintance premise, he asked me "why did the person gave a gift, is the person is a relative of mine", he asked. really he had a sincere mind set where such a practice should not exist.

I didn't remember mentioned this story to anyone. I hope he get his place in the heaven.

diary of a father III - loss

today I received a news of that one old friends died. certainly death is unavoidable for all living things. death should be able to wake us up to think back what have we done so far. have we hugged our family today. have we called our friends and family who lived away from us. or in the larger scale what have contribute to our society and country and even religion.

I believe all of us have faced a loss, near or far. I've lost a son three years ago. he died at birth. I prayed to God that I could see his eyes. and my prayer was answered when I had a dream. in that dream someone is holding my son. he was quietly falls asleep. his face is clean and his eyes shut. then slowly he opened his eyes and looking to me. and really I can looked into his eyes. just what I was praying for. now I'm praying that I would be able to meet him again.

really life is wonderful and it is human being who make it wonderful. not things.

diary of a father II

the start of my family is a very ordinary matters. we built our home on love and built our house from pieces of paper. our shoe rack was from boxes and our first car was rather less than ordinary. we washed our clothes by our bare hands and had our less than average food. but it was a happy life then. there was no TV, sofa, even bed or fridge. there were very less 'things' on those days. very much less.

diary of a father

I'm an ordinary people with a very common life style that probably won't attract anyone attention. what I face everyday must have been faced by anyone else in this world. but after such episode with my son, I want to pen down all my life long experience so that all my kids know that I'm an average people but I always want to be special to them. we are given a very short time on this world but the responsibility is so much.

may be I want to start my diary with "to my children, and my wife, and my family. I'm just another ordinary person. but you're all always special to me as I always want myself to be special in your life".

my son II

what shall I do to undo the mistake.

my son

I was away from home for a few days when my wife received a letter telling that my son 'hit' his friend. I was shocked and disbelief. so just now we went to see the teacher who signed the paper and got a 'relief' explanation: he was actually involved in a 'rough' play - common to kids, but must be controlled.

but what really made me shocked and speechless was the teacher told us how our son had actually spoke to her (the teacher) on his grievance that I work very far away from home. he, being a quite person, never told us such feeling. and we never asked him. my God, what have I done? I'm such a rascal person who believe in dignity and integrity in 'black and white only' mode. so what is there left for me?

england on fire

so what triggered fire in england? racial cards?

Japan, 'nuclear energy free' society

so finally the Japanese revealed its policy on nuclear energy - 'will reduce Japan's reliance on nuclear power, aiming at creating a society that will not rely on atomic power generation'. and the Japan prime minister has even promised to challenge the 'conventional belief' that nuclear energy is safe. but so far I've yet to see how are they going to just do that. I believe I've wrote on this last time. come on Japanese, show the world how will you do it so that the rest of us can learn.